Planning a Catholic Wedding

Congratulations on your engagement!

The community and staff of at the Parish of Saint Mary want your marriage to be as successful and rewarding as possible.  In this spirit, we offer you the following information to make your preparation easier and your choices clearer.
Arrangements should be made ONE YEAR in advance of the proposed wedding date. Please finalize your arrangements with our parish BEFORE finalizing arrangement with your venue.

Weddings are scheduled for registered families of the parish.
Occasionally, for just cause, weddings are scheduled for non-parishioners.**
**In this case, a letter of permission must be received from the pastor of the parish in which you reside.

Scheduling a date is very important and is set only after you have discussed it with the parish office and confirmed it by a member of our clergy team.

Offerings

In order to secure your date and time, one-half of the church offering must be made at your first meeting with a member of our clergy.  The remainder is due at the final meeting.  The music fee is due at the liturgical prep meeting (as outlined below)

Should you need to cancel, the initial deposit is non-refundable.

This offering does not go to the priest or deacon.  If you would like to give the priest or deacon a gift, as is customary, this is your option and would be greatly appreciated.

A Prenuptial process must be completed.  This will include meeting with the priest or deacon and a participation in the Facilitating Open Couple Communication, Understanding and Study (FOCCUS).

A particular marriage preparation workshop will be discussed with you when meeting with the priest or deacon.  It is your responsibility to complete such a program well in advance of your wedding date.
CLICK HERE TO VIEW AVAILABLE OFFERINGS IN THE DIOCESE OF TRENTON

Baptismal records from the church where each party was baptized.  These are to be recently dated copy of the Baptism certificate (issued within six months) is required, front and back, with proper annotations.

A Marriage License is issued by the municipality where the bride resides, if in the State of New Jersey.

You must apply within thirty days of your wedding day.

Please note that there is often a seventy-two hour waiting period when applying for your license.  Please bring your license to the Parish Office no later than TWO WEEKS  before your wedding date.

The Marriage formation process

STEP ONE: Initial meeting with clergy to establish freedom to marry.  (Bring records)
(First deposit due at this meeting)

STEP TWO: Complete the FOCCUS online (instructions given following first meeting

STEP THREE: Pre-Nuptial Inquiry and FOCCUS feedback with clergy.

STEP FOUR: Attend a Pre-Cana session of your choosing.

STEP FIVE: Pre-Nuptial Inquiry and Pre-Cana feedback with clergy.
(Second deposit due at this meeting)

STEP SIX: Nuptial Liturgy meeting with member of our liturgical team (Discuss readings, music, processions)
(All offerings due at this point)

STEP SEVEN: Rehearsal - generally the evening before the wedding.  Rehearsals for Sunday weddings are following the Saturday anticipatory Mass.

STEP EIGHT: WEDDING DAY!

DECOR

Aisle runners, Rice, Bird Seed, Flower Petals are strictly prohibited by directive of our insurance carrier. Balloons are not permitted for environmental reasons. Bubbles are allowed.

Flowers in the church are to number no more than two baskets and are to be real flowers reflecting a noble simplicity, not an ostentatious display.  These are to remain in church.

Please note that the church will be decorated according to the liturgical season - please consider these standards when choosing your colors.  Decorations to the pews are more than welcome but are not to be attached with tape, adhesives or tacks.  Adornments to the pews must be fashioned to hang on the outer edge.  Please speak to your floral designer for other options. Pew adornments must be collected by your florist, wedding coordinator, family member etc, if you wish to keep them.  Otherwise they will be disposed of following the ceremony.

UNITY CANDLE

The “unity candle” is not part of the Catholic Rite of Matrimony, and thus is not permitted within the Diocese.  If you wish to incorporate this custom into your wedding day, the reception is the time and place.

MUSIC

Music will be discussed at Step Six as outlined above. 
Your music fee includes organist and cantor.

DECORUM

THE CONSUMPTION OF ALCOHOL OR OTHER CONTROLLED SUBSTANCE IS PROHIBITED PRIOR TO THE WEDDING CEREMONY ON THE GROUNDS OF THE PARISH.  WEDDING TOASTS AT THE ENTRANCE TO THE CHURCH OR ON THE GROUNDS IS STRICTLY PROHIBITED BY DIRECTIVE OF OUR INSURANCE CARRIER.

Thank you for your cooperation.

Photographers and Videographers are requested to function as discreetly as possible.

They are welcome to take pictures/video before, during, and after the wedding ceremony.
They are requested to remain in the rear or side of the church once the ceremony has started so as not to distract the guests or interfere with the sacrament.  

Remember - A WEDDING IS A DAY, A MARRIAGE IS A LIFETIME!

OTHER RESOURCES
Click the links below for documents to assist you in preparing for sacramental marriage in the Catholic Church.  

OUTLINE OF A CATHOLIC WEDDING
MARRIAGE: The Sacrament of Enduring Love

HUMAN SEXUALITY, MARRIAGE and FAMILY LIFE